Thursday, 13 March 2014

Thoughts on Swinging Clubs - guest post from YSL


Lots of people dream and fantasise about being in an environment or building where they can walk around surrounded by naked or scantily clad people who are completely at ease with the situation and they can casually wander about seeing people have not only one on one full sex, but group sex, just as if it were a Roman orgy or the Playboy Mansion. I was one of those people just a few years ago and never thought that in my lifetime I would ever get to experience it whatsoever. It is akin to looking at film stars on the red carpet where you know it does really happen, but you simply dismiss it as something that 'other people' do and you will never have the opportunity to experience it first hand as 'that star'.


And so time went on where I thought that seeing or further still, being a participant of group/communal sex would be an unfulfilled part of my existence on this planet.....until that is, I met a lady who suggested that we try a local swingers club, which would be a first for both of us. With neither of us having any previous experience in this area, we had absolutely no idea of how it would work, what type of people would be there, but we were fixed in our minds that the whole point of making the journey there and paying the entrance charge is the opportunity to have sex either in front of or with others. And so we nervously phoned the club to ask for directions and other details, then on the appointed evening nervously pushed open their front door, but as soon as we got inside and found how friendly and 'normal' everyone was, we were instantly at ease and our usual selves.


In common with most swing clubs in the UK, our local club does not have an alcohol licence, so you can bring along your own, but you are expected to buy the sodas from them. These are served in a bar/lounge area which serves as a social area and the 'play rooms' are in a separate area upstairs. The first thing that struck us both as a little unexpected was how many people were in the social area just simply chatting for a prolonged period of time. We thought that given that we have paid to be in the building, everyone would be using it for its primary purpose, after all, you can enter a bar for free to have a chat, and they have the luxury of an alcohol licence too. Anyway, neither of us were interested in simply sitting drinking coke and our shop bought wine, we were there to live the life, so wandered into the play areas. All of the rooms were empty, what was this all about?? Back for drinks for another forty minutes and still nobody has moved upstairs, so it was a case of, 'well, someone has to get things started, so let's just do this'. We went upstairs, the room felt a little cool as it hadn't been used that night and we just started between ourselves. Over time, other couples come up and a pleasanttime was had, however the group play really didn't last all of that long, perhaps forty minutes at the most. We had expected it to last the rest of the night until closing, as demonstrated by the lady I was with deciding to 'pop off to the bathroom' at one point and then coming back a few minutes later to an empty room with only me in it.


I went a second time with the same lady and we had a similar style of evening, the only difference this time being that we went straight in to the play, whether there were others in the room or not. Although I have given the impression above that it was a bit of deflating experience, this is only due to hindsight as at the time, it was something, new, exciting, daring and my god, I was having group sex with complete strangers who were genuinely up for it!!!


The next time that I went to the club was the evening after I first met Yummy. I had previously promised another lady that I would take her as she was intrigued and excited by a first club experience and I didn't wish to let her down as she didn't drive and the club is located in a bit of remote area. I even said to Yummy at the time, 'I can't believe I'm saying this, but I could do without going to a sex club tonight', mind you, it was five in the morning after seven straight hours of my first exploration of Yummy and I had to be at work two hours later!!


So anyway, it was another night at the club, it was interesting and then followed the next night with Play Date number 2 with Yummy, which was somewhat of an exciting marathon and the start of wild sex being a part of my everyday life.


From that evening on, Yummy and I were very much wrapped up in each other and just had a passion for each other and we joked at the time that we must be the world's worst swingers as we made no attempt and had no interest in playing with others. However, as time moves along and it is not because of waning desire for each other, we suggest that we go to a club together. We went to a club that is out of our area, about a two hour drive, and stayed in a hotel nearby. It was exciting to be away, getting dressed together, doing something new together and a bit of an adventure. At this point we had both separately been to clubs prior to meeting each other, but this was our first time together.


The club was very large, well maintained, friendly staff and we got chatting to a couple at the bar who found it unbelievable that we had only recently met as we appeared to be so established. We moved on to the play area and had a wonderful time, although over the course of the evening we didn't actually play with anyone else and really the opportunity didn't arise for this to happen. Some of the other couples were either unsuitable (i.e. ugly) or others weren't interested in having us join in, however it was a great night and we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves.


After this we went to Cap d'Agde for the first time, of which there are plenty details about the adventures and clubs that we enjoyed along with a UK club that we popped in to on the way back home after the flight.


Following our return from France, we became joint members of our local club and went on an almost weekly basis for about six to nine months. Right from the very first visit that we made to the club, we had a spectacular time. The club was busy, the people were interesting, charming, arousing and they were all up for play!!! This was certainly an improvement on the earlier visits that I had had and really was all that I dreamed that swing clubs would be. We enjoyed twelvesomes, Yummy and I kissed whilst we had a delightful lady below us (Yummy sitting on her face, whilst I had my cock in the lady), Yummy enjoyed me cumming in her and then swiftly followed by another man entering her, Yummy had her first taste of black men, I enjoyed the enthusiasm of multiple woman, it was just heavenly. The club was so good and enticing that one evening I had just flown back from where I had been working that day and at 9pm I was waiting for the cabin door to open, sent Yummy a message to ask if she fancied going and we were both in the club by 10pm, naked and fucking!!!


We had the time of our lives over those six/nine months, but slowly things died down. The club became less busy, the couples drifted away and were replaced by single men who simply got worse by the week. One memorable week, we really wanted to play and did, but the problem was that there were just too many single guys and as the evening wore on they got more and more frustrated and got too close prior to asking permission, so we simply had to get up, dressed, and out of the door. The weeks went on, we went less frequently and I just remember looking around on the last night that we went and saying it is the night of the gargoyles as all of the men were beyond unattractive, they were repulsive. For the last few visits we only stayed in the bar area drinking our sodas, fully clothed and left after about forty minutes. Certainly not the fantasy impression of a sex club, or indeed the reality that we had enjoyed only a few months previously.


During that period and the intervening time since, we have visited literally dozens of clubs and whenever people ask us what we think of a particular club, we always answer that it is all about the people who are there on the night as opposed to judging a club on solely on the random night that we attended. There is only one UK club that we have visited that we will never return to based upon the infrastructure of the club itself, examples being vinyl play bases that were in poor states of repair, uninterested staff where it was difficult to get them to pour you a drink and when waiting for a taxi, the barman spent his time checking to see that his car was OK as we were in a dubious neighbourhood.


A club doesn't have to be busy for us to have a great evening. We visited one where there was only us and another couple in there and we had a spectacular night with them. We then returned a couple of months later, the place was rammed and we had an even better night. So empty or full, we had good nights, it's all about the people.


Another good example of the 'people theory' is the series of daytime private parties that we have attended at our local club. The parties are organised by one very good single guy and he holds the invite list, only allowing a certain number of single guys according to the number of couples attending. There are only a couple of rooms that are opened up, so this keeps everyone together and there is a real spirit of togetherness at these parties with most people playing for the full five hours that the club is open from 10am to 3pm. Most people who attend are regulars at these gatherings now, however at the first party nobody knew each other, but we all instantly got on very well. This is in contrast to a BBW evening that we attended at another club where it was fine whilst we were in the bar area talking to people, but they left the whole of this huge club open, so come playtime nobody could find anyone and it ended up with simply couples exclusively pairing off and not the open and inclusive play that we enjoy.


So we have established that good people who are there on an evening are key to making an enjoyable evening and having a club that has friendly staff and acceptable facilities is what is expected. However there are some rules that clubs really do need to follow and implement if they wish to make customers happy and comfortable, and it is a recent experience that has prompted this post.


A couple of years ago, we tried to support a new local club that had just opened up, but to be honest they were a bit amateurish in their approach and attitude, but their heart was in the right place. The club had some small private play rooms with doors that could be closed, but as we believe in inclusive play, we always kept them open, however sadly the staff let single males come in and wander around the building, not only fully dressed, but still with their outdoor coats on too!!! I remember looking up at one point and seeing a group of fully dressed men with overcoat parkers on simply watching us having sex as if it was some sort of peep show where we were the entertainers. Given that we had paid our entrance fee, we were damned sure that providing in-house shows wasn't part of what we had signed up for. We appreciate that some couples like to be watched, and on occasion we do, but this was not in the right spirit at all, it was simply bad management of a club and not how a swinging club should run.


As above, a recent similar experience has prompted this post. We went to what was billed as a BBW night at a club in the UK and we had been to this club a couple of years previously and thoroughly enjoyed it. As usual, the club doesn't have an alcohol licence, so we brought a bottle of wine (with a cork in it), however nobody had a corkscrew, so we spent the first twenty minutes hanging around whilst various people tried various ways of getting our drink out of our bottle. Never mind, these things happen, as poor an opening as it was, but things rapidly went downhill. As is standard, we then went straight to the changing rooms, outdoor clothes in to the locker and underwear left on for both of us. We then entered the main section of the club, which unusually has a pool table in the middle and a flight of stairs that goes up to a balcony that overlooks the pool table and has small play rooms off from it. So there we both are, in underwear, ready for action, and all of the way up the stairs and lined up around the balcony looking down are fully dressed single guys..........waiting. This all felt a little odd, and having reached the top of the stairs we looked in to the play rooms, which were completely devoid of people. Outside of one of the rooms were three separate couples, up against the walls, completely clothed, snogging. As Yummy clearly expressed at the time and I was thinking, it was like a school disco or youth club, except that all of the actors were in their 40's. It was immediately apparent that this night simply wasn't going to work, however to give it a chance we ducked in to one of the play rooms to have our drink, but all we got was a perv in glasses (fully clothed) twitching his cock through his jeans as he occasionally poked his head around the door. Horrible.......and utterly miserable.


We simply had to leave and we did tell the owners why too.


This swinging business really is all about the people, not some imagined fantasy that you wish to fulfil, as reality can so often be very different. For us, there appeared to be this 'golden period' that we went through within the first year of us meeting and it genuinely isn't some sort of rose tinted reminiscences of an early honeymoon period between us where so much is overlooked or forgiven. The people in clubs were better and in our one to one (or rather, two to two) meets via Fabswingers, we met so many people and had such great fun, but now I browse profiles and very little intrigues me anymore, and often I feel repelled from some profiles. Where did all of the good people go?


There are still some good things around. The private parties at our local club are excellent, we have some lovely ladies that we occasionally meet up with and there is one outstanding club in the UK that does an excellent BBW day/night, which is once again organised by an enthusiastic lady who keeps control of the guest list as opposed to it being a standard club night.


Prior to first going to a club, I didn't even consider going alone as a single male as I didn't wish to have what I perceived to be the stigma of 'yet another single male on the lookout' and now, after all of my experience, I still wouldn't attend as a single male as I wouldn't wish to be labelled as one of the crowd of desperate single males.


We enjoy clubs and there are good ones out there, and not every night can be a success, the clubs can't guarantee who or how many will be there on any given night, but there are certain things that should be enforced, and dressing down in play areas for men is top of the list.

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