Swinging, boundaries and the holiday

Swinging with YSL so far met and exceeded my expectations, I've done a few firsts but the main and most significant first is swinging with someone I care for so much.

Previously I've been to clubs, parties or enjoyed 4somes with a friend/fuck buddy, J being the most notable, we were good friends he always made sure I was safe and happy and we had fun.

With YSL it feels different, it's about adding to 'us', sharing more pleasure together. Each time we have swung our connection together has been so much closer, both times we have enjoyed the most erotic sex together for hours after. I don't know if it's the added dimension of pleasure, the need for intimacy and as ever for me reassurance (I do wish I would stop the need for it but I think it's just that chink in my armour that I have to live with and YSL seems happy to deal with).

My next major first was YSL fucking me while alternating sucking 2 cocks. I was hesitant at first, not because I didn't want to but because I needed that reassurance that it was part of the shared experience, I don't want to do something that is just for me.

It works in reverse and I'm pleased from our chats ysl is of the same mind. I dont want YSL to go off and fuck someone else in another room, I want to be there, share the moment, be connected even just by sight.

It's an arousing thought to share YSL with another woman. I can't explain how amazing it feels to be fucked by him, It's kind of like when you're in a great restaurant and your meal is amazing, you want to eat it all yourself, not share any but you also need someone to know just how perfect it tastes.

There is little that I wouldn't try with YSL at my side, I'm open minded and want to experience so much so long as he was enjoying the experience but the test is whether I will enjoy/repeat/climax.

I've done things in the past that directly haven't turned me on but seeing how much it turned my partner on has given me so much pleasure and been the beneficiary of that passion, much like the cock sucking on Wednesday.

The other factor of enjoyment for me and I think YSL felt the same was how aroused others were by our actions. To know a room full of men were all hard because they were watching me cum is quite a heady thought and a huge turn on.

To take things further I've asked YSL to be in charge on Wednesday, I want him to tell me what to do, it turns me on just thinking about him doing that. Before going we are going to have a chat to discuss so he feels comfortable doing so.

The other week as YSL masturbated me he told me about scenarios he wanted to see, how he wanted to hold me close while others touched/licked/fucked me, I want that but I know I will struggle at the time to ask for that even though YSL has made it so clear I can ask/do. I also know it will turn me on more doing it 'for him'. I have a few fantasies I enjoy when playing with myself that are about doing sexual acts for my lover, the taking away responsibility for my actions and doing it to please turns me on big style. I want to here him say "do it for me", "take it for me", "choose which one to join us" I know how arousing those words will sound coming from him.

Whilst this might be a shock to some of you but I can be shy and lack confidence at times and I think I might enjoy more with YSLs instructions. I'm confident enough with our relationship to say no to something I don't want and I also trust YSL not to put me at risk, plus he reads me well, he can tell how I'm feeling even if I'm hiding behind a smile.

Also the active verbal encouragement, YSL has such a way with words when we are playing together, he leans in close, his face pressed to mine, his words are not often what others would consider dirty talk but they convey a stronger more arousing message than that. The last weekend away when I was tied to the wall, his words alone had me at the point of cumming, he explicitly described how he was going to let a stranger touch me, that they were going to make me cum (wet now recollecting that moment). As people came into the room that YSL did not feel were good enough for me he pulled in closer, kissed me so deeply, almost a primitive or animalistic way of showing ownership, it had me dripping.

You might if gathered from the subtle suggestions THE COUNTDOWN me and YSL are off on holiday together or should I say we both have a business trip! You might also of gathered the holiday is to involve swinging. In readiness for our holiday I'm pleased we are doing some club visits, this is all untrodden ground between me and YSL and I want to feel we have understood each others boundaries and comfort zones by the time we get there so we get the most from our week together.