Never been so far away and need him so close. We spoke twice today as he flew away from me. I hate the initial few days after we have been together it feels so raw, I feel so invisable. Kids have been so affectionate tonight, it's like they know I feel so alone yet I'm sure i cover it so well.
Missing the sex as well, havent touched self today, havent been alone long enough. Hoping when he lands and gets to hotel he will get online. Hope he will make me cum for him, I want to cum for him.
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Saturday, 30 January 2010
Friday, 29 January 2010
so aroused
1st day of the sex drout, I'm aching to be touched by him. Nobody else does it the same, the way he holds me so tight, the way he makes me feel so small against his height.
We had talked about me enjoying a woman while we are apart and it's hanging in my mind and making me aroused again. He wanted to see me with a dominant woman who would fist both my holes and tease me on his behalf on camera. I don't think its something I want to do, I've enjoyed fem fem but always been left with the ache for a man.
Id love to surprise him though to flick the cam on and for him to be greated with the sight of me being fisted. His face was a picture and his cock was so hard the day he turned the cam on and I was fucking myself with my shoe!
Off to demonstrate ability as domestic goddess and mother of the year....
We had talked about me enjoying a woman while we are apart and it's hanging in my mind and making me aroused again. He wanted to see me with a dominant woman who would fist both my holes and tease me on his behalf on camera. I don't think its something I want to do, I've enjoyed fem fem but always been left with the ache for a man.
Id love to surprise him though to flick the cam on and for him to be greated with the sight of me being fisted. His face was a picture and his cock was so hard the day he turned the cam on and I was fucking myself with my shoe!
Off to demonstrate ability as domestic goddess and mother of the year....
Thursday, 28 January 2010
aching for him
He is boarding the plane as I type this, I can feel the miles starting to mount and the distance again. I hate this bit, 4 days of bliss together, amazing sex and such intimacy and now nothing.
Other than the children it will be weeks until anyone even holds me let alone make me tremble.
So last night.... both in late from work, i got there just before him and got showered. He arrived in and we lay holding each other for an hour, talking... we had an issue... I think its all sorted now but only time will tell, we both ended up with tears streaming down our faces. We both know we love each other and don't want it to end but i think we are both afraid of the distance and the time apart.
We retired to the bedroom to lie naked and hold each other, the raw emotion of the earlier upset ended up being the catalyst for some passionate sex.
We were spooning as his hands started to wander, his big hands taking hold of my nipples and rolling and twisting them until it took my breath away, I have a high pain threshold and as ever I love to push it and he knows it. I start to touch myself as he turns me one but he took both my hands in one of his and held them, told me I needed to wait till he was ready. He pushed himself inside me in one fluid movement pulling me so hard onto him and not letting me move an inch.
He pushed the bullet vibe (god i love them!) between my pussy lips and again held me firm and fucked me so hard.
He wouldn't let me cum again, pushing me to my very limits but not pushing me over the edge. He withdrew and sat before me and pushed his clenched fist deep inside me and turned up the bullet to full speed. i stuck 3 fimgers in my ass and within seconds I started to cum, squirting over him.
This morning was when we upped the stakes so to speak, fingering my pee hole while fisting me, I came so much the cum sloshed out of me when he finally withdrew his hand. He came in my shoes and place them on me when I was ready for work. I could feel it through my toes all day as i sat with my stinging ass, raw cunt and a very very pleased smile on my face.
Other than the children it will be weeks until anyone even holds me let alone make me tremble.
So last night.... both in late from work, i got there just before him and got showered. He arrived in and we lay holding each other for an hour, talking... we had an issue... I think its all sorted now but only time will tell, we both ended up with tears streaming down our faces. We both know we love each other and don't want it to end but i think we are both afraid of the distance and the time apart.
We retired to the bedroom to lie naked and hold each other, the raw emotion of the earlier upset ended up being the catalyst for some passionate sex.
We were spooning as his hands started to wander, his big hands taking hold of my nipples and rolling and twisting them until it took my breath away, I have a high pain threshold and as ever I love to push it and he knows it. I start to touch myself as he turns me one but he took both my hands in one of his and held them, told me I needed to wait till he was ready. He pushed himself inside me in one fluid movement pulling me so hard onto him and not letting me move an inch.
He pushed the bullet vibe (god i love them!) between my pussy lips and again held me firm and fucked me so hard.
He wouldn't let me cum again, pushing me to my very limits but not pushing me over the edge. He withdrew and sat before me and pushed his clenched fist deep inside me and turned up the bullet to full speed. i stuck 3 fimgers in my ass and within seconds I started to cum, squirting over him.
This morning was when we upped the stakes so to speak, fingering my pee hole while fisting me, I came so much the cum sloshed out of me when he finally withdrew his hand. He came in my shoes and place them on me when I was ready for work. I could feel it through my toes all day as i sat with my stinging ass, raw cunt and a very very pleased smile on my face.
Wednesday, 27 January 2010
restrained and not allowed to cum
Got back from the office early especially to prepare myself for him. Needed to ensure I had enough time to shower, shave pussy smooth and lace myself into a corset put the stockings and heels on. I lay on the sofa ready for him, he text to say he was on his way so I slipped the blind fold on and cuffed myself. I thought i'd set the mood!
He got the message loud and clear, I heard his intake of breath as he saw me, I could feel his smile of approval then I felt the first spank land on my ass.
He discovered the bullet vibe I had between my lips as he trailed his fingers over my smoothness. He ordered me to go to the bedroom and told me I wasn't allowed to cum.... I felt the revenge about to start from teasing him so much last night.
He took the cuffs off for a moment and as he did I took the opportunity to touch myself, knowing I wouldn't be able to for hours, he grabbed my wrists and pinned them down, the restraints went on this time my hands were behind my back, I was helpless and vunerable.
I was so wet his fist went inside without any lube I needed to cum but knew I had to hold it for now, I'd have to earn it.
For the next 2 hours his actions contradicted his words, telling me I couldn't, mustn't and better not cum, but he was doing everything in his power to make me. He alternated from licking me till I was at the edge, fisting me then using the bullet on my clit. It was like I was wired to the mains. Each time I was at the edge I was begging him to be allowed to cum, then begging him to stop touching me when I was told I couldn't and if I did what the consiquences would be. Then all of a sudden, as he pushed 2 fingers in my ass I had no control it started, I came so hard, I gushed and squirted cum on his fist.
He got the message loud and clear, I heard his intake of breath as he saw me, I could feel his smile of approval then I felt the first spank land on my ass.
He discovered the bullet vibe I had between my lips as he trailed his fingers over my smoothness. He ordered me to go to the bedroom and told me I wasn't allowed to cum.... I felt the revenge about to start from teasing him so much last night.
He took the cuffs off for a moment and as he did I took the opportunity to touch myself, knowing I wouldn't be able to for hours, he grabbed my wrists and pinned them down, the restraints went on this time my hands were behind my back, I was helpless and vunerable.
I was so wet his fist went inside without any lube I needed to cum but knew I had to hold it for now, I'd have to earn it.
For the next 2 hours his actions contradicted his words, telling me I couldn't, mustn't and better not cum, but he was doing everything in his power to make me. He alternated from licking me till I was at the edge, fisting me then using the bullet on my clit. It was like I was wired to the mains. Each time I was at the edge I was begging him to be allowed to cum, then begging him to stop touching me when I was told I couldn't and if I did what the consiquences would be. Then all of a sudden, as he pushed 2 fingers in my ass I had no control it started, I came so hard, I gushed and squirted cum on his fist.
Tuesday, 26 January 2010
at least he made it up to me with filthy kinky sex
He was late again last night, always late, always work.
I fell asleep waiting for him, catching up on some of last nights missed sleep. I was woke be the feeling of a hungry tongue in my crotch. I love to be woke up this was, just like this morning i was woke by his hardness inside me. I was mad at how late he was but it would have to wait until id cum. Normally I'm quite submissive but I'm happy to switch and i was in the mood for it last night. I took hold of a hand full of his hair and ground myself on his face covering him in my cum. then told him until i said so he couldn't touch his cock again.
For the next couple of hours I teased him so much, made him wear my panties and forced him to watch me cum from just inches away and not touch him or me. he was begging to plunge himself into me so i let him rest the tip of his cock an the entrance of my dripping wet cunt. He was shaking by this point and with a very red ass from the delightful spanking I gave him because he had adjusted himself.
I was all too much for him, he decided to take what was rightfully his. It was what I hoped he would do, take back control, take me. he fucked me so hard telling me I deserved it for being a dirty teasing slut, god I came so hard, pinned down and so full of his beautiful big cock.
We eventually got dressed and headed out for dinner, it was nice to have a change of scene but I wanted to get back and get filthy again as soon as possible.
We played all night and he ate dessert out of me followed by the deepest anal fisting I have managed. Its taken nearly 6 months to manage it, each time he has pushed me more, it was december I managed it for the first time but could only cope a few seconds, it was so intense, but last night i managed very well. We did it in the kitchen and the sound of my gushing as i came splattering on the kitchen floor was amazing. I might of mentioned before he has a shoe fetish and i ended up with my high heeled mary janes inserted in both holes, wow did it feel so good.
However this morning has to be the most outrageous thing we have ever done together. He'd woke me fucking me and as ever he'd ended up fucking my ass but he couldn't cum as he needed to pee..... He paused and held me firm, i felt the warmth first as he started to pee in my ass.... so he stopped still and within seconds I was so full of him, it was an amazing experience, it felt like his cock was swelling in my ass, growing bigger and deeper.... wow!
I must add it was a long run to the bathroom after!
So I'm at work, tired and tender, yearning to be near him again, only 2 more days of him then he flies home, unsure of our next meeting.
I fell asleep waiting for him, catching up on some of last nights missed sleep. I was woke be the feeling of a hungry tongue in my crotch. I love to be woke up this was, just like this morning i was woke by his hardness inside me. I was mad at how late he was but it would have to wait until id cum. Normally I'm quite submissive but I'm happy to switch and i was in the mood for it last night. I took hold of a hand full of his hair and ground myself on his face covering him in my cum. then told him until i said so he couldn't touch his cock again.
For the next couple of hours I teased him so much, made him wear my panties and forced him to watch me cum from just inches away and not touch him or me. he was begging to plunge himself into me so i let him rest the tip of his cock an the entrance of my dripping wet cunt. He was shaking by this point and with a very red ass from the delightful spanking I gave him because he had adjusted himself.
I was all too much for him, he decided to take what was rightfully his. It was what I hoped he would do, take back control, take me. he fucked me so hard telling me I deserved it for being a dirty teasing slut, god I came so hard, pinned down and so full of his beautiful big cock.
We eventually got dressed and headed out for dinner, it was nice to have a change of scene but I wanted to get back and get filthy again as soon as possible.
We played all night and he ate dessert out of me followed by the deepest anal fisting I have managed. Its taken nearly 6 months to manage it, each time he has pushed me more, it was december I managed it for the first time but could only cope a few seconds, it was so intense, but last night i managed very well. We did it in the kitchen and the sound of my gushing as i came splattering on the kitchen floor was amazing. I might of mentioned before he has a shoe fetish and i ended up with my high heeled mary janes inserted in both holes, wow did it feel so good.
However this morning has to be the most outrageous thing we have ever done together. He'd woke me fucking me and as ever he'd ended up fucking my ass but he couldn't cum as he needed to pee..... He paused and held me firm, i felt the warmth first as he started to pee in my ass.... so he stopped still and within seconds I was so full of him, it was an amazing experience, it felt like his cock was swelling in my ass, growing bigger and deeper.... wow!
I must add it was a long run to the bathroom after!
So I'm at work, tired and tender, yearning to be near him again, only 2 more days of him then he flies home, unsure of our next meeting.
Monday, 25 January 2010
How it started
Yes I'm a wanker, always found myself needing to cum almost everyday if not more than once. The husband lost interest in sex when we had the kids, yes sounds like reverse roles. I've done everything from the naughty undies, the sending sexy messages, letting him catch me play, but nothing, told me he would put kettle and asked would i be long!!! Is he gay or am I ugly was my 2 worries, then is he having an affair. Well maybe all???
I can tick off ugly and gay abut the affair still is my favourite, but maybe he just got old and i didn't notice.
So to save my sanity and to prolong the family unit staying together I decided to embark on an affair. I armed myself with several glasses of wine and a laptop and entered I want an affair into google. Wow its was an eye opener.I had no idea how may people where in the same family trap as me. I joined an upmarket site that was for married professionals. I met some great men but after lunch they wanted dinner and after dinner they want theatre.... as they say... you had me at hello and I can ill afford the extra calories.
By the time you got to the theatre there was talk of love and long lasting relationships..... all well and good but these guys hadn't had sex with there wives in years and were more lacking in sexual finesse than a stick. and lets face it they have to be able to kiss.
So i decided to move down market, a friend I met on the afore mentioned site recommended a book and swinging, butcher baker candle stick maker, it was a good read, little did i know it was to be about me.
I joined a swing site and sat and waited for a response, it took all of 10 seconds i think. I was snowed under with filthy requests and i was starting to panic that id gone too far to the other end of the spectrum. I spent the next 2 weeks just looking until one Friday, husband was away with the kids so i decided i should talk to someone off the site to find out more. My search criteria was, tall, young, experienced and no cock pic... how many cock pics are there on those sites!
I found a profile 33, 6ft 3, verified as being a very very bad man and a cute pic of his ass in the tightest of Calvin's... mmmm yum.
I went to message him but panicked, I ended up cancelling it ... so I thought.... I had sent an empty message to which I got a cheeky reply... messages went back and forth then for an hour or so, he seemed fun, intelligent and look delicious.
He asked if I would be up for a drink and seeing as I was alone for the night, well the whole weekend in truth. I went home showered and picked out some cheeky underwear and a thoroughly naughty shoes teamed up with a sexy dress. I was shaking on the way for the drink, I only spoke to this guy 2 hours ago on line and I'm going to meet him, am I mad!!! Plus according to his verifications he was very experienced, very kinky and plays all night long... he will eat me alive I could hear screaming in my head.
After 1 drink it was so clear we had chemistry and it was only going to end one way... my knickers on his bedroom floor. I offered to take him home and thank god he accepted, i was scared to death he would turn me down. As we pulled up at his again I was shaking fearing rejection. the gods were kind and he suggested one more drink before I head to my friends (fake back up story I had just in case he turned out to smell!).
We drank, we talked, we laughed and we got naked.
I didn't notice getting naked until he stopped for breath from giving me oral. He then turned me over and fucked my ass. Something until then i hadn't really enjoyed. but at this point it was amazing. Within minutes it was like the sex Olympics, I did more firsts that night than I've ever done. My most amazing discovery though of the night is that a gush and squirt when aroused enough. I'd arrived at 6pm on the Friday and I left on Sunday at lunch time. We didn't sleep, we only stopped to eat and take on board fluids. It was a huge sexual watershed for me. I was myself in the bedroom for the first time.
And he laughed when I said I'd been fearful he would eat me alive... turned out I did the eating... I devoured him. I left him an empty shell of a man but with a smile.
This was the start of regular and filthy sex exploring my fantasies and discovering new ones.
I can tick off ugly and gay abut the affair still is my favourite, but maybe he just got old and i didn't notice.
So to save my sanity and to prolong the family unit staying together I decided to embark on an affair. I armed myself with several glasses of wine and a laptop and entered I want an affair into google. Wow its was an eye opener.I had no idea how may people where in the same family trap as me. I joined an upmarket site that was for married professionals. I met some great men but after lunch they wanted dinner and after dinner they want theatre.... as they say... you had me at hello and I can ill afford the extra calories.
By the time you got to the theatre there was talk of love and long lasting relationships..... all well and good but these guys hadn't had sex with there wives in years and were more lacking in sexual finesse than a stick. and lets face it they have to be able to kiss.
So i decided to move down market, a friend I met on the afore mentioned site recommended a book and swinging, butcher baker candle stick maker, it was a good read, little did i know it was to be about me.
I joined a swing site and sat and waited for a response, it took all of 10 seconds i think. I was snowed under with filthy requests and i was starting to panic that id gone too far to the other end of the spectrum. I spent the next 2 weeks just looking until one Friday, husband was away with the kids so i decided i should talk to someone off the site to find out more. My search criteria was, tall, young, experienced and no cock pic... how many cock pics are there on those sites!
I found a profile 33, 6ft 3, verified as being a very very bad man and a cute pic of his ass in the tightest of Calvin's... mmmm yum.
I went to message him but panicked, I ended up cancelling it ... so I thought.... I had sent an empty message to which I got a cheeky reply... messages went back and forth then for an hour or so, he seemed fun, intelligent and look delicious.
He asked if I would be up for a drink and seeing as I was alone for the night, well the whole weekend in truth. I went home showered and picked out some cheeky underwear and a thoroughly naughty shoes teamed up with a sexy dress. I was shaking on the way for the drink, I only spoke to this guy 2 hours ago on line and I'm going to meet him, am I mad!!! Plus according to his verifications he was very experienced, very kinky and plays all night long... he will eat me alive I could hear screaming in my head.
After 1 drink it was so clear we had chemistry and it was only going to end one way... my knickers on his bedroom floor. I offered to take him home and thank god he accepted, i was scared to death he would turn me down. As we pulled up at his again I was shaking fearing rejection. the gods were kind and he suggested one more drink before I head to my friends (fake back up story I had just in case he turned out to smell!).
We drank, we talked, we laughed and we got naked.
I didn't notice getting naked until he stopped for breath from giving me oral. He then turned me over and fucked my ass. Something until then i hadn't really enjoyed. but at this point it was amazing. Within minutes it was like the sex Olympics, I did more firsts that night than I've ever done. My most amazing discovery though of the night is that a gush and squirt when aroused enough. I'd arrived at 6pm on the Friday and I left on Sunday at lunch time. We didn't sleep, we only stopped to eat and take on board fluids. It was a huge sexual watershed for me. I was myself in the bedroom for the first time.
And he laughed when I said I'd been fearful he would eat me alive... turned out I did the eating... I devoured him. I left him an empty shell of a man but with a smile.
This was the start of regular and filthy sex exploring my fantasies and discovering new ones.
wow, ouch and mmmmm
What an amazing night. He woke me from my hangover nap with a kiss. Plane was early so he beat the alarm I'd set so didnt have time to check make up or druel. He seemed pleased, the physcial indicator was very very apparent. Havent seen he since 1st week of december but it was like we had only been to work that day.
If you knew what we are like you would think there would be nothing more kinky we could do but we did, I will look back on last night with a fond and dirty smile. He says im amazing and everything he could ever want.... I translated that too im a dirty filthy whore in the bed room that caters to his foot fettish and every other kinky urge he might have.
Especially as he had managed to work his foot into my cunt then my ass.
So despite another night no sleep im sat in office clinging on to the desk and a can of redbull for life with a tender and happy ass, damp panties and an urge to start again. thank god i have him for another 3 days.
If you knew what we are like you would think there would be nothing more kinky we could do but we did, I will look back on last night with a fond and dirty smile. He says im amazing and everything he could ever want.... I translated that too im a dirty filthy whore in the bed room that caters to his foot fettish and every other kinky urge he might have.
Especially as he had managed to work his foot into my cunt then my ass.
So despite another night no sleep im sat in office clinging on to the desk and a can of redbull for life with a tender and happy ass, damp panties and an urge to start again. thank god i have him for another 3 days.
Sunday, 24 January 2010
origional plan
Looks like he will find me asleep purely because I'm still up partying. Been having a wii night! Have won 12 out of 12 dance off's and remain champion hoola hoop! I consider that me prep for the next 3 nights, what else comes close to how many hip thrusts I will do?
I'm drunk and no doubt in the morning I will be hung over when faced with 3 kids wanting pancakes and before 7am.
Haven't started to pack except for toy bag has made it out the locked filing cabinate. New undies are hidden and need to pack work attire to stop hubby being concerned, mind you I doubt he would notice if I was hit by a bus at the min. Best friend even commented that she hadn't seen me and him speak tonight other than through the kids..... Ask daddy if he needs another drink etc...
We are just sharing space, for those that think I'm a bad person for having an affair my excuse is we haven't had sex for year dispite my begging, despite him laughing when I've come down stairs in the corset heels and stockings. I've tried it all, nothing has work so I salvaged myself and realised I might be worth something. I might be worth a second glance.
I still love him,spent over half my life with him, he just doesn't see me anymore.
Less than 20hrs till I'm seen by him, no longer invisable, I'm going to be a whole person again for r nights, 4 days.....
I'm drunk and no doubt in the morning I will be hung over when faced with 3 kids wanting pancakes and before 7am.
Haven't started to pack except for toy bag has made it out the locked filing cabinate. New undies are hidden and need to pack work attire to stop hubby being concerned, mind you I doubt he would notice if I was hit by a bus at the min. Best friend even commented that she hadn't seen me and him speak tonight other than through the kids..... Ask daddy if he needs another drink etc...
We are just sharing space, for those that think I'm a bad person for having an affair my excuse is we haven't had sex for year dispite my begging, despite him laughing when I've come down stairs in the corset heels and stockings. I've tried it all, nothing has work so I salvaged myself and realised I might be worth something. I might be worth a second glance.
I still love him,spent over half my life with him, he just doesn't see me anymore.
Less than 20hrs till I'm seen by him, no longer invisable, I'm going to be a whole person again for r nights, 4 days.....
Friday, 22 January 2010
torn
Should I go with the plan to be asleep and let him wake me with him fisting me or should I wait in the underground garage with the coat on stockings and heels and surprise him?
Each have there merit... currently feeling the need to be taken not to take but who knows on sunday, I might get an urge to take him, he so wants me to over power him. Joys of us playing both side both want both. I want him to ruin me, abuse me and fill me but I also crave to tease him and make him beg for me to touch him.
Each have there merit... currently feeling the need to be taken not to take but who knows on sunday, I might get an urge to take him, he so wants me to over power him. Joys of us playing both side both want both. I want him to ruin me, abuse me and fill me but I also crave to tease him and make him beg for me to touch him.
filthy mind
It seems that he has a plan that fits with my thought of being woken by him.
Saturday is still between us and I have a day of busy domestic rubbish followed by a mad night with a good friend and the kids. Pizza wine and dancing always make a good mix.
Sunday morning im sure will be full of a hangover but managable because of excitement. I plan to leave for my 'business trip' just after lunch and get to the apartment via food and wine shopping. I need the carpet picnic, an essential ingredient for any all night sex session. wine, cheese, italian meats and good bread always go down a treat!
I will spend the afternoon pampering, having a bath, doing feet.... he has a foot fettish so very important.... mind you I think I have one too!
Anyway back to the plan.... he plans to see how many fingers he can get inside me with out waking me... and lets face it I'm not going to wake up until I think there is enough!
Saturday is still between us and I have a day of busy domestic rubbish followed by a mad night with a good friend and the kids. Pizza wine and dancing always make a good mix.
Sunday morning im sure will be full of a hangover but managable because of excitement. I plan to leave for my 'business trip' just after lunch and get to the apartment via food and wine shopping. I need the carpet picnic, an essential ingredient for any all night sex session. wine, cheese, italian meats and good bread always go down a treat!
I will spend the afternoon pampering, having a bath, doing feet.... he has a foot fettish so very important.... mind you I think I have one too!
Anyway back to the plan.... he plans to see how many fingers he can get inside me with out waking me... and lets face it I'm not going to wake up until I think there is enough!
Excited
Been 7 weeks since I've seen him and I'm so excited I get 5 days with him.
The last time we locked ourselves away for 4 days, with only brief interuptions for work and more wine. Was hard parting as we knew it was going to be nearly 2 months until we got to see each other again, our longest ever. Add Christmas into the mix and its been hell.
Just got delivery of new underwear, Goks new leopard print set, should be a sexy treat. Just hoping the stockings i ordered are long enough!
Things have got so heated sexually the past few days on phone and msn, we are so aroused, I can only visualise the wild and passionate sex that will happen on Sunday. Ive decided to stay in bed to greet him instead of collecting from airport. I might even have an afternoon nap and let him wake me mmmm I love to be woken by him penetrating me and lets face it it might be the last sleep I have for days!
The last time we locked ourselves away for 4 days, with only brief interuptions for work and more wine. Was hard parting as we knew it was going to be nearly 2 months until we got to see each other again, our longest ever. Add Christmas into the mix and its been hell.
Just got delivery of new underwear, Goks new leopard print set, should be a sexy treat. Just hoping the stockings i ordered are long enough!
Things have got so heated sexually the past few days on phone and msn, we are so aroused, I can only visualise the wild and passionate sex that will happen on Sunday. Ive decided to stay in bed to greet him instead of collecting from airport. I might even have an afternoon nap and let him wake me mmmm I love to be woken by him penetrating me and lets face it it might be the last sleep I have for days!